TO BE....I think... :)

Well, let me update you on the school process. It is looking more and more like it might be a "reality" and not merely a "possibility". I did finally decide to apply to the college and about a week later got a letter saying I'd been accepted BUT the program was full and I was #1 on the waiting list....I wasn't sure what would happen. About 3 days after I received that letter, I got a letter stating that I had been accepted into the Early Childhood Education Program. So, I went to the information session to see about getting funding and found that I fit all the criteria. My next step is to have a 3 hr interview (!), which happens July 6th. After that I will know if I qualify for the funding. Then I have until July 12th to make a final decision. Anyways-that's where it's at!

BEFORE it gets any later-I want to give a special shout out to my AMAZING husband. I know Father's Day was a couple of weeks ago, but this man deserves more praise than anyone else that I know. I will never know why I am the lucky woman that he chose to marry, but I will be forever grateful that he did choose me. I have never known anyone with all the qualities and characteristics that Jeremy possesses. I have known people who possess some of the same qualities, but no one who is the "total package" like he is! He has a personality bigger than life and is one of the most refreshing people to be around. He can make everyone laugh, he is the hardest worker EVER, he is smart and can figure anything out just by tinkering with it, he loves me and the kids more than anything else in this world and I know he would do anything to make me happy. He has a great sense of humor and doesn't take himself too seriously. He can lighten any situation and is good at "talking me down" when I get riled up. Lol. (Honestly, you'd think I was the Italian-not him!) He loves Heavenly Father and easily forgives others. He makes me want to be like him. I have seen some people do and say some terrible things to him and he lets it hurt for just a second and then moves on-without bad feelings in his heart towards them. I could go on and on and on, but I will just say that I am so very glad he is mine. More than anything I am grateful to a loving Heavenly Father and my Savior Jesus Christ, for making it possible for us to be together forever...NOT just in this life! I am happy that when we got married I heard "for time and all eternity" and not "'til death do you part". My kids couldn't have been more blessed-to have a dad like him is every little kid's dream and not all kids get to have what they have. We are blessed.

ON THE RENOVATION FRONT: This is what my house looks like right now:

Actually, that is kind of a lie. We actually got one of our new windows put in the other day. My all-knowing, renovation expert Father, came over for a couple of hours and helped us put it in. I never wanted to be a renovator but I have to say-I am awfully glad that my Dad is around to share his expertise with us. We really shouldn't have ever been home renovators-but sometimes that is just the most economical way to get things done. Jeremy is a fast learner too and once he is shown something, he catches on right away and remembers how to do it for the rest of his life. It has been an education, that's for sure! Our new window looks SO nice and I can tell what a difference it will make. I can't wait to see what my house will look like when it is all said and done. I am having a hard time seeing past the "garbage dump" that my house looks like right now! Lol. I am not too good at visualizing things before they happen. I know that with Jeremy and my dad and my brother-in-law Trent, that it will be BEAUTIFUL when it is done. None of those men know how to do anything but great work!

Well-this has really turned into a novel! I am sure you all have better things to do than sit here for hours, catching up on my boring life! Lol. I will try to get back into the habit of writing more frequently, so I don't have all this catching up to do next time! Thanks for reading. xoxox

To be or not to be....that is the question!

Today was a FULL day. It consisted of lots of different things-some fun and some not so fun. Lucky for the boys, they were able to play with Auntie Sara and Theran. They had the funnest time, with one adventure after another. They got to go for a walk in the "big city", buy a treat, eat perogies, paint pictures and watch a movie!!!! Ummm-why can't I have an Auntie Sara? :)

Sara was providing childcare so that my very shy self could have my husband with me while I went to check out the college (GASP!). We have found a really neat government program that will pay for my course (anything under a year) and give us a living allowance every month as well! I am seriously considering going back to school this fall (I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit). I have really mixed feelings about it and mostly it is just my low self-esteem getting in my mind. I am worried about driving every day, leaving my kids, doing well in school, etc. I kind of grew up feeling like I wasn't good at anything and like I wasn't one of those people who could have dreams and make them come true. Seriously, I am not looking for sympathy-so don't bother offering it. This is a blog and it is as much for me to get my feelings out as it is for entertainment on your part. I guess what I'm saying is, "Don't tell me I am not allowed to feel this way or that I am silly for having these feelings." I have lived a life with lots of people who roll their eyes at me and tell me I "shouldn't" or "can't possibly" be feeling a certain way. Well, my feelings are my own and they are really how I feel-I don't know how else to put it. I realize that I am sounding like a crazy person but I just feel frustrated today. I thought I would walk into the college feeling all mature and self confident, like I could actually go through with it and INSTEAD, walked in feeling like a shy, nervous, self-doubting individual. ANNOYING. I am so tired of letting my fears hold me back in life. I don't want to be someone who lets fear dictate her life. I want my dreams and hope to dictate my life. Ok, that is it-I am making a conscious choice to quit living in fear. I am going to have dreams again and by golly, I will do whatever it takes to make those dreams a reality!!! Whether it is going to the college in the fall or getting some other course under my belt or travelling to places I want to go, etc....I am just going to DO IT! Phew, that was exhausting. Thanks for listening. :) :) :)

JELLY BEANS!

So the other day when we were planting the garden, we got to the last couple of rows and decided to do beets and beans. I look over and Ty's eyes are HUGE...I can see the wheels in his head turning......then this: "Grandma, what kind of beans are we planting......JELLY BEANS?!" Oh the sadness when he learned that jelly beans cannot be grown in a garden. I love this sweet little boy with all my heart!

Spur of the Moment=Exhaustion!

Well, we are crazy...we thought it would be a fun idea to go camping down at the campground that my parents manage here in town. After all, it was only a few blocks away-how hard could it be? (Hahaha). The end result was 2 pretty tired parents, but happy kids who had a super fun weekend. Next time, I'd like to be able to stay for longer than 1 night though-just to make the hard work more worthwhile. Here are some pictures from last night:

Jake, Cammy and Ty watching "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs" in the tent trailer-popcorn compliments of their loving mother. :)

Grandpa trying to teach Jake how to roll down the hill!

Jake and his best friend in the whole world-his cousin Theran. These two are the cutest little pair you have ever met. They LOVE each other and their interactions are so adorable. My sister in law and I just sit back and watch the show, laughing the whole time. They are the cutest little boys EVER!

One of my sweetest moments as a mother, came last night as Jeremy and I watched these 3 ride off into the sunset together on their bikes. A wave of emotion hit me and I was so grateful when I thought of them and saw how much they were loving each other at that very moment. It made me feel so peaceful and happy-like maybe it is possible that they really will grow up to love each other! :)

On yet another note-we got to go to church today and teach our Sunbeams! Last week was Stake Conference and the week before that we were camping in Pincher Creek, so it had been 3 weeks since we had seen the little guys. There was a little trepidation on their part and they weren't so eager to come in and sit down with us at first, but that turned around quickly and pretty soon we were having a great time together. They were all so reverent today! We had 10 3/4 year olds and it didn't even seem like there were 2. We really couldn't ask for better behaved kids! I LOVE the primary lessons-especially Sunbeams. Nothing like going back to the basics. Today we taught 1 1/2 page lesson about feelings. I love that the lessons are simple but so powerful. There were lots of things I needed to hear! It was so short, but we STILL ran out of time-such is life with little ones. They say the darndest things at the most inappropriate times, but that is part of what I love about this calling. At one point today, 3 of the little boys all had to go to the bathroom at the same time and it nearly turned into complete pandemonium. Luckily any accidents were averted and all 3 were able to make it to the washroom just in the nick of time. Lol. Anyhow-I think I'm about to fall asleep at my computer and it's only 8pm....time for bed I guess! I can only hope that what I have written is cohesive enough for you to interpret. :D xoxoxo

"Gratitude is the Essence of Worship"

Here's what I am grateful for today:

1. I am SO grateful for my family. My husband, my children, my mother, my father and my amazing siblings and siblings-in-law. :)
2. I am thankful I was able to go to Pincher Creek for my neice's birthday party this afternoon and that all my children got along and were well-behaved. (Well, except Jake in Walmart, but he is 2, so it is to be expected that shopping isn't his favorite thing!)
3. I am grateful for my AMAZING, superhuman husband, who works like a crazy person day after day, after day! Today he had 3 huge jobs, cut up and delivered an entire load of firewood to the campground and took a bunch of our renovation mess to the dump! WHERE does he get his energy?! I have never met someone who is such a hard worker. LOVE the man!
4. I am grateful I was able to drive home safely and get home before it was dark. I have a really hard time driving-it makes me really sleepy and relaxed. Also, at night my eyes are terrible-even with my glasses. I am a scaredy cat, that's for sure! I am trying harder to be more independent though and not rely on Jeremy for so much and tonight I DID IT!!! Yay me!
5. I am super happy and thankful for my new camera. I have wanted a new one forever and this week they had a great deal on a 14MP Fujifilm camera. When I got there the lady told me they'd just sold the last one. I was about to cry (not really) and turned around to go when she said "wait a sec-let me just check one more thing." So she scanned it with her gun and VOILA! They had 2 more in the back. (Only took them 45 min. to find which box and get it to me! haha)
6. I am thankful that my mother is letting us use her garden space this year. The kids and I went and planted a garden for about 3 hours today. I feel so blessed that I was able to teach my children how to plant a garden and I am super excited to watch their excitement as it grows! So funny to think that such tiny little seeds can yield such a huge amount of food.
7. I am thankful for my hottub that is going to make my sore muscles feel great again, as soon as I am done posting this! :D
8. I am thankful for my life-each day is a gift that has not been promised to us and the very breath that we breathe is a tender mercy. I am trying to do better at showing my gratitude, by making each second count. I am not great at it yet but I am getting sooo much better!
9. I am thankful that even though we were all exhausted and even though the kids were 3 hours past bedtime when we got home from Pincher Creek, they still reminded us to have family prayer and read scriptures (I figured it still counts, even if we only read 4 verses! Lol)
10. I am thankful for amazing football kids who continue to let us know how much Jeremy has influenced their lives. Tonight was Graduation and one kid who has a really special place in our hearts, brought his date over to our house and had her take a picture of him, Jeremy and I. WOW-I know a few teenagers and not many who would be so respectful and outwardly grateful! It meant alot to us.

Anyhow-that was my exciting day!!! Oh yes, how could I forget to mention-I purchased the dvd of Mary Poppins tonight. Can't wait to share that childhood happiness with my kids this weekend. I have to laugh right now-every time I say "my kids", I think of this little old man in the nursing home where I used to volunteer. I told him I had 4 "kids" and he said "You mean children!!! What are you raising-a bunch of goats?!" LOL....he was so irritated that I hadn't used better grammar. HAHAHA. Ok, I am exhausted obviously and rambling. So, goodnight blogging world. xoxoxox

The 5 People You Meet in Heaven...

So tonight we finally sat down to watch the same movie we have been meaning to watch for the past week. Something has always come up and we end up postponing our movie night. SO glad we decided to sit down and watch it tonight. It was called "The 5 people you meet in heaven" (based on a book by Mitch Albom). EXCELLENT show-the kind that has a purpose and really gets you thinking and reccommitting to being better and understanding life on a deeper level. If you haven't seen this, I would highly recommend it. It is kind of long-a bit over 2 hours...but for sure worth it. There were alot of excellent quotes: Here are a few I liked the best:

"Holding anger is a poison...It eats you from inside...We think that by hating someone we hurt them...But hatred is a curved blade...and the harm we do to others...we also do to ourselves..."

"Lost love is still love, Eddie. It just takes a different form, that's all. You can't hold their hand... You can't tousle their hair... But when those senses weaken, another one comes to life... Memory... Memory becomes your partner. You hold it... you dance with it... Life has to end, Eddie... Love doesn't."

"Strangers are family you have yet to come to know"

And this one was my favorite:

"There are no random acts...We are all connected...You can no more separate one life from another than you can separate a breeze from the wind..."

It is really so true-everything and everyone is inseparably connected. The ending packed such a punch! I will be thinking of it for days. I don't know anyone who hasn't wondered at some point in their life if they are making a difference, or if anything they are doing even matters......this show reminded me that YES! we all matter and we all need each other. No matter how seemingly insignificant our lives are, in reality they matter a great deal. Sometimes we may never know the good that we've done or the far-reaching effects our lives have had on others until we are on the other side and able to see with our "other" eyes. Just something to consider. Seriously though, if you haven't seen the movie, it is a gooder. (Definetly a little too heavy for kids though.)

AND...onto renovation news! Lol. Do not ask me how, but Jeremy actually found someone who wanted our old siding!!! (And did I mention that he sold our HIDEOUS metal roof off the garage for over $400?!!!!) This morning around 10am, a guy from Warner showed up with 2 of his buddies and by 4pm all the siding had been removed! We didn't even have to lift a finger-even though Jeremy couldn't help himself sometimes. :) SUCH a blessing-it would've taken us 3 or 4 days to get that all of by ourselves! The house is looking just great...... And to think that someone once considered that stucco beautiful....well, that is just sad! Here are the latest pictures. I really had better get some sleep. I need to remember that part of the word of wisdom is going to bed early and rising early. Yeah, not so good at that yet. :S Goodnight all. xoxo

Sweet looking house, huh? :)

Goodbye Sanity-Hello Renovations!

Oh, who am I kidding? I was never sane to begin with. However, ANY sanity that may be lurking in the dark recesses of my mind is about to flee. I PROMISED myself that I would never be a home renovator. I grew up in a constant state of renovation and swore I would never be one of "those" people! (Hahaha) Mom and Dad, you know I love you.....right? :) Anyways, long story short, I AM one of "those" people. I have also learned that it doesn't have to be a bad thing and alot of good can come from it. For instance: we have been renovating our home for almost 8 years now and we have grown closer as a couple because of it. Relying on each other and working through problems is part of renovating a home together. So, for that I am thankful. Also, we live in a HOME, not just a house; a home that WE created! We have everything just where we want it and almost how we'd like it. (I'm pretty certain it will be a never-ending process.) Anyhow, here are some pictures of what my house looks like tonight. Some guys are coming tomorrow to take the siding off for us and after that, it is windows, doors and THEN, "THE BIG ONE"....the roof has to come off (thanks to some lovely dry-rotted homemade trusses from the original owners) and we will replace it, while putting another floor on top of our house at the same time. Wahoo........I'm trying to find the excitement in it all, but it eludes me at this moment. Lol.

The east side of the house

The south side of the house (the one our poor neighbors across the street have to look at every day)

Also today, we were busy with preschool shots and Camryn's "Un-birthday". All the kids at school get to celebrate their birthdays, so at the end of the year, anyone with a summer birthday gets their own special birthday party. Today was Camryn's, so we took cupcakes with Dinosours on top. They were a hit. It is so fun to be a mom and to see the excitement in my children's faces when people make a big deal over them. I could tell she was on cloud nine and feeling so special. She is a real sweetheart.

Camryn with her special school friend

How cute is this? The nice nurse gave Ty

this bear for being so brave at his shots.

He didn't part with it for the rest of the day.

Anyways, better get some sleep and enjoy my last night of sanity. :D xoxo